TSOS #_5 Listening for Fun & Profit DRAFT

The old adage makes the point: you have two ears and one mouth: use in same proportion. You can’t learn if YOU are talking.
Listening is hard work. First, you have to get people talking. Second, you often will/can be the person who leads the discussion… but how? By asking questions.

So “talking” is part of listening. What comes first? It depends.

if someone is willing to talk, let them go…While they are speaking, Take notes of cadence, changes in tone, etc. and let them go until you get a chance to ask clarifying questions… to ask what I call “gap questions” — to seek missing detail.

If the reverse is true, say you are following up on their visit to your website, then I had a stock open ended question. I’d start by reminding them that “I am following up on your visit / call” —- establishes that you are just being responsive to them:

• “What prompted their visit/call ?” — what’s going on in Their business
  — why is this important?
  The goal early on is to get them talking about key aspects of their inquiry.
• don’t make it obvious you are qualifying: qualify first around motivation and business reason, urgency … you can get other specific details along the way.
• “how do you see this playing out?”
  Get them to verbalize their current vision. Verbalization brings their thoughts out into the open … hardens them. It’s an important psychological step in helping them commit… to themselves first of all. It helps them solidify their thinking.

So, your first efforts are “talking” — now we’re ready to switch roles.

Your next “talking” is now to build rapport and convey your role.

• “Thanks for that detail — based on what I’ve just heard we can help.”...or if you can’t, let them know: “We don’t do that…” Better to move on.
• That’s it. You may have some specific questions to answer for the prospect … get a few easy ones off the table… starts to build rapport.
• Ultimately, before you conclude the call, you want to focus on the key driver(s) — not minutiae. Make sure you understand and have the detail. This is an important feedback loop: to the prospect you are showing genuine interest and you are talking about their project –not yours.
• shift to: “ for next conversation, I’d like to include xxx from my team to hear the next discussion”..”who would you add?”
  Surface other influencers. Quietly, you are being presumptive about “the next meeting”
• close with “what’s your best next step and when?”

remember, it’s important to listen… but someone has to shape the dialogue.

Other Active Listening skills:

• Focus on the prospect – be attentive
• Listen for tone, energy, inflections
• Don’t rush to speak during a pause
• whenever the prospect starts talking STOP talking IMMEDIATELY — NO EXCEPTIONS — – even if you are mid sentence; the prospect is “thinking out loud” – if you talk you might miss something important — and there is nothing you can say that is more important than what the client has to say.
• When you do talk, don’t rush. Pause for reaction. Try to use same cadence as the prospect – it’s called mirroring – it’s human nature to work with people who are. Like themselves…think about it.
• Reflective listening helps: give the user feedback to get confirmation – but be careful because if you feedback word for word its mimicking and can get annoying – use it to summarize key points – in your words.

Every conversation should end with a next step. My good friend Ron Holm of the Track Selling Institute, calls it An act of Commitment”  — sharing info, a meeting, read your proposal, an introduction. Some next step. Track Selling is great on this – and earlier in my career I learned a lot from SPIN selling on this topic as well.

NOTE: This is make or break: if you don’t get a commitment to a next step, it will be hard to reconnect — this is where many leads go —

Alternative: make some suggestions and try and get the the client to talk about future steps: it’s called “coaching the witness”

• “what would you say to your boss about this sale?”
• “What’s your goal here in an ideal world?
• “What do you think the influencers will say?”

You are leading the discussion but its all customer talking.

Listening is not just you asking / they respond: its a feedback loop on anything they say: weather, co workers, concerns.

I’ve attached a list of “killer questions” I developed and used — that can be used early, are structured but not scripted, and in my experience creates a conversation.

Some final thoughts:

• Scripts: I can’t use a script … and in fact scripts fly in the face of listening: they are telling. But they can be a list of talking points: whatever, make it natural, make it you.
• Don’t use cliches, don’t use hyperbole, don’t use words you don’t know.
• “Don’t spill your candy in the lobby” When you give up something too early: discounts, concessions, before you get to a proper negotiating position.
• Finally, There is a condition that is somewhat embarrassing .. but it can happen to us all… where we get overly eager to tell the prospect “the can’t wait” info you want to share: it’s called PE: premature elaboration….patience is the only cure though there is a low cost sales aid ….

Conclusion: Remember if you are looking for a mutual win, you are a participant – not just an observer. Your role is not to just listen, but to be helpful in shaping the direction of the conversation: organizing, sharing some info, name dropping, making “what if” recommendations. If you know the market, your products/services, competition — you have a lot to offer…a meaningful conversation helps you understand the prospect’s needs and allows you to demonstrate your expertise in small bits.

Your list of Killer Questions

https://thestoryofselling.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/01/closing-killer-questions-jan2023-master-1.doc